Definition of one type of Stalker:
- Won’t take no for an answer
- Has an obsessive personality
- Above average intelligence – not necessarily “book smart”
- No or few personal relationships
- Lack of embarrassment or discomfort at
actions (pay attention to how he treats the waitress, the cashier, etc)
- Low self esteem
- Sociopathic thinking
- Has a mean streak (may not be directly towards you – at first)
Definition of a Sociopath as taken from Merriam-Webster online dictionary:
A person who behaves in a dangerous or violent way towards other people and does not feel guilty about such behavior.
(Of course this is a watered down and simplistic definition and the characteristics of a sociopath are clearer)
Antisocial personality disorder is characterized by a lack of regard for the moral or legal standards in the local culture. There is a marked inability to get along with others or abide by societal rules. Individuals with this disorder are sometimes called psychopaths or sociopaths.
Diagnostic Criteria (DSM-IV)
1. Since the age of fifteen there has been a disregard for and violation of the rights of others, those rights considered normal by the local culture, as indicated by at least three of the following:
A. Repeated acts that could lead to arrest. B. Conning for pleasure or profit, repeated lying, or the use of aliases. C. Failure to plan ahead or being impulsive. D. Repeated assaults on others. E. Reckless when it comes to their own or others safety. F. Poor work behavior or failure to honor financial obligations. G. Rationalizing the pain they inflict on others.
2. At least eighteen years in age.
3. Evidence of a Conduct Disorder, with its onset before the age of fifteen.
4. Symptoms not due to another mental disorder.
OTHER CHARACTERISTICS TO BE AWARE OF:
- Glibness & Superficial Charm
- Manipulative & Conning – They see their behavior as permissible, can appear to be very charming. They are actually very covert about their hostility and domineering desires. They strive to dominate and humiliate whenever possible.
- Grandiose Sense of Self; Sense of Entitlement
- Pathological Lying – It is almost impossible for them to be truthful on a consistent basis. They even believe themselves and are quite convincing.
- Lack of Remorse, Guilt, or Shame – Instead of true friends they have victims/targets or accomplices who become victims.
- Shallow Emotions – What appears to be love, joy, compassion, or heartfelt is merely feigned emotions and serves as an ulterior motive. They are not genuine, therefore neither are their promises.
- Need for Stimulation or Living on the Edge – May have verbal outbursts, be promiscuous, or gamble frequently.
- Lack of Empathy – They feel contempt for the emotions of others, or those in distress and will readily take advantage of them.
- Poor Behavioral Control with an Impulsive Nature – They strive to create hopelessness/helplessness in their victims. They believe they are all-knowing, entitled to their every wish; no matter the expense of others. They have no sense of personal boundaries and no concern of their impact upon others.
- Early Behavior Problems – They have a history of behavioral and academic issues yet get by via conning others. They have problems making and keeping true friendships. There may be cruelty to animals and people, stealing, setting fires, etc.
- Irresponsibility and Unreliability – They have no concern for wrecking others lives and dreams. They are indifferent to the devastation they cause and will not accept blame; instead they will blame others, usually the very ones they have destroyed.
- Lack of a Realistic Life Plan or Parasitic Lifestyle – They tend to move a lot or will live off others; exploiting and using to any extent possible. They have a poor work ethic and cannot keep a job for long without being “found out”.
- Criminal or Entrepreneurial Versatility – They will change their image accordingly in order to avoid being discovered or prosecuted. They will change their life story as needed for any given situation or circumstance.
**Disclaimer – I am not a professional psychiatrist and am not trained to diagnose others. Be very careful when applying labels to other people, whether you think it may be true or not. It can be dangerous for you to tell a sociopath that you think they are a sociopath, particularly if they have a history or propensity toward violent behavior.